Alcoholism & Marriage
Marriage can be difficult for many people, but when you mix alcoholism and marriage, a whole separate set of problems can arise. A strain on the marriage relationship, worry about your spouse’s addiction to alcohol, even fear of violence can occur when alcohol is used to try and solve problems.
Of course in most cases it is the presence of alcoholism within the marriage that is causing the problems in the first place.
If your spouse is an alcoholic, it can be a great source of stress for you, which can strain your marriage.
Because of the physical effects of alcoholism, you may worry about your spouse’s health. This can be particularly stressful if your spouse doesn’t see drinking as a problem despite the physical toll it’s taking.
There are also emotional effects of alcoholism that can cause stress between spouses. In addition to worrying about your spouse’s physical health, you may worry about how alcohol is affecting your spouse emotionally. Alcoholism and marriage come with emotional stresses, and those who drink to try and solve their problems simply compound those emotional stresses instead of solving them.
Additional stress on a marriage can arise when you see a problem with your spouse’s drinking, but your spouse refuses to acknowledge that there’s a problem, or that something needs to be done about it. You may get frustrated with each other and fight about your spouse’s excessive drinking, and the drinking may become the focus of your relationship.
Alcoholism can also take a financial toll on your marriage. In addition to the cost of alcohol, your spouse may be spending money unnecessarily in other places, as well, due to of the impaired judgment that comes from alcohol abuse.
Worry about finances, alcoholism, and marriage are all things that put a great deal of stress on people, but they’re not the only problems that can arise when a spouse is addicted to alcohol.
Danger of Abuse
Some alcoholics become verbally or physically abusive to loved ones when they’re drunk. This creates a dangerous situation for spouses and children. You should never stay in an abusive relationship.
No matter how much you love your spouse, you have to protect yourself and your children. You may want to support your spouse in any way you can, but your safety and the safety of your children come first.
What To Do
There are many ways that alcoholism can cause problems for a marriage. Worries about your spouse, financial problems, and verbal and physical abuse can all combine to make alcoholism and marriage a volatile mix.
- If you think your spouse is an alcoholic, don’t turn a blind eye to the situation. If you feel safe to do so, confront your spouse and talk to them about the problem. Make sure your spouse knows you’re worried and that you want to help. DO NOT confront them bluntly if you believe they will react negatively or even aggressively towards you.
- Whatever else you do, make sure you get help for your spouse. Alcoholism doesn’t just go away on its own, so you need to give your spouse love and support, as well as the proper professional resources, to break the addiction to alcohol. Don’t pretend that everything is okay, or that it’s not a problem. The best way you can help your spouse is to get your spouse help.
Alcoholism can be a scary experience for loved ones. With the knowledge of how alcoholism and marriage affect each other, and if you can help your spouse get help, recovery from alcoholism can be an experience that makes both of you stronger – you can then start making good memories again.